The Island

Speed boat to the Island costs 350 Baht, wait there’s a slow boat, best check the price for the budget! By back packing standards we’ve had a blow out, the full schubonka, best tighten the purse strings. OK the slow boat which takes 2hrs n a bit, is 250 Baht. Versus the speed boat, 35mins for 350? It’s 2 quid in it for 90 mins of your life. Broken down it’s 2.22p a minute to do something else other than sit on a fucking boat. Obviously we take the quicker option. I’m fast learning there are times in life when budget is not always the best option. Examples that can be included in this list are rucksacks & bacon for starters, sometimes you just have to say Fuck it.

We’re back, the only place in Thailand, apart from the Capital that the KP has been before. She doesn’t realise how lucky she is! No, not coz I’m a fantastic lover :-P. It’s becoz there are plenty of places within the kingdom that are quite frankly, fucked, Phuket & Phi Phi are prime examples, nowt to do with the Tsunami I might add. Thankfully I’ve only ever been once, unfortunately, after it had already become the ‘Thai Trecco Bay’.

We rock up at the island and enquire about rooms, with a Yankee Doodle dandy, who happens to run a travel agency. We agree to stay at his place which has a “cool deck & good cook”. 400 baht, or 8 quid. We rent a bike, it’s named the bluebird, blue n yellow she is, our baby for the next 10 days, 150baht a day, bargain. It’s so cool here, I don’t even need show my passport. It’s why we are back, along with the fact there’s no cars, 7-11’s, bank machines or general electricity. The roads are only a metre or so at their widest.

Our jungle bungalow, is typical Thai style built on stilts, with good ventilation. Has a shower n toilet. It’s basic and worn but it’s home for now. The Jenny stops at 10, so it’s lights out whether u like it or not. We do like it, or a least that’s what we tell each other. Both of us tho’ are a little apprehensive. We’ve not slept in the jungle before!

It’s great at first, like when you make a tent in your bedroom out of blankets as an 8 yr old. When we wake at 3 tho’ it’s a different story. There’s a frog in the room, cockroaches up the wall & noises. All sorts of noises, we end up nervous laughing for about an hour, when we stop we agree that tomorrow we’ll check out other places to rest our heads.

We take an early morning spin, before the sun rises to its peak. I’m a ginga, she’s dark skinned, but believe it or not folks – hates the sun more than me! (Another reason as to why I love her to bits). She doesn’t want to become more dark. Good luck with that love, the summer is yet to kick off.

As we’ve been to the Island before, and also that it’s mega quiet right now. We decide to chill for the majority of the duration here. The highlights of the stay were as follows :

Phosphorus:  Now I’m not sure if this is all technically correct, and can’t be Arsed to ask google. In the water after dark there was this Luminous Phosphorus stuff. Plankton maybe, that must get charged by the rays of the sun during the day. Then emit this energy once disturbed. I’m not kidding 20m of shore, I was like harry  potter casting spells into the oblivion! {if anyone out there understands this phenomenon, please share it with a comment}

Bonfire: Yes on the beach, which is linked with Phosphorus above, but more memorable for KP’s first words of the evening as she joined me a safe distance from the flames, “Look at her pussy!” I almost choked, it’s like being with one of the boys, but stopped helped by the sight when I raised my head slightly. The bird opposite us from down under, Oz, her actual bit’s down under, were on clear display through her fancy see thru panties, not helped by the fact she had those chunky outer lips that some ladies are blessed with. A vision I’m finding difficult to erase!

New Friends : We met a friendly very knowledgable girl from Belgium & a solid, fun & also knowledgable local, who can do that slack line, fire juggling malarkey. He had one of the funniest believable, unbelievable stories I’ve heard to date. Unfortunately we didn’t get the chance to video this fantastic event, which for sure would go viral with a capital F. Wee swore that on another Island, the monkeys there fished crabs with nets left by fishermen. Then smashed the shells with rocks and had a party. One drunken evening he convinced me the monkeys could also use rods to fish, and even wind the reel. “Sure, Sure for sure, yes fishing monkey, sure, I tell you”. To be honest even now, I still believe. Epic ! It’s an excuse to go back that’s for sure. Like when you go to Paris and forget to go to the Eiffel Tower.

Storm : Refer to a later blog here

The Monkeys : She’d been going on about the little fuckers all the time we were there. Can we see the monkeys, can we see the monkeys ? I hope so, it’s not a fucking zoo, preferably not with teeth exposed. We’d missed them on a few occasions but heard lots of tales. Two tribes of wild monkeys on the Island, one good, one bad. As we were leaving the far end of the beach for the last time (we’d been to collect my hat, before departing). As we came out of the tress onto the beach, they did so also, 20m to our right. Slowly heading towards the rocks, I presume for fishing not one of the fuckers had a rod tho’. A family of between 15-25 in number monkeying along the sand and trees, towards the rocks. Awesome! KP was well happy, she almost wet herself I think. Actually she might ave’ as was soon in the waves before we headed back to BlueBird for the last ride home.

Digs : After a second night at the ‘most basic digs on the Island’. We stayed out of respect for the owner, but also to learn just a little bit more, that you must appreciate the joy of a hot shower. Next place which was only an additional 300 baht a night, had hot shower, pool, gym, privacy, romance, a slightly challenging bike ride (I’m like a cunt on a motorbike, so great practice). We had a bliss time until the immigration police turned up. They were no harm, maybe just a bit loud, but they were the plod, the pigs, and like anywhere else in the world they drop your mood, unless that is when they come to your resuce, which is rare, but always appreciated. Thankfully we only needed to endure them for a day.

The Rest : Found some excellent new restaurants, shot some wicked silhouette pics, made friends with a lemur, watched wild hornbill birds being hand fed.


And there you have it, the man from Immigration is calling…..”Please come in Kazak Princess, your 15 days is almost up!” Thankfully, we have fucking enjoyed it. In the words of Oliver Twist “Please sir………………..”

2 thoughts on “The Island

  1. Pingback: Thai Storm | Welsh Boy & Kazakh Princess in Asia

  2. Pingback: Back To The Beginning | Welsh Boy & Kazakh Princess in Asia

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